I have had enough of this! It’s time for a rant. Prepare yourselves, boys. This is going to get ugly.

I’ve been thinking about the Steubenville rape case, and the responses to the guilty verdict. I’ve been thinking particularly about the responses from men to the rape itself, and the verdict that followed, and I want to ask one thing… WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU MEN THINKING?

All the shaming the victim bullshit is not only demeaning to women, but it demeans men even worse, and I’m wondering why the FUCK you guys are putting up with it? Why aren’t you all screaming from the rooftop that these assholes raped a woman, texted about it proudly, and deserve to have their lives totally ruined because of it? Why are you allowing people to blame the victim? All I can think is that you really have no idea what all of this is saying about men. Well, let me tell you what your silence is saying about you. Maybe that will change your mind.

First of all, it’s saying that men are all animals, and that when faced with the prospect of sticking your dick into something, you can’t control yourselves. It’s saying that men are just all rapists at heart, and that women are responsible for you NOT having the opportunity to rape them. A woman is drunk and available, so you just have to rape her cause, Gosh that opportunity can’t go to waste now can it? I mean, you certainly can’t be held responsible for taking advantage of a woman in the prone position. Women are nothing more than walking holes for you to stick your dicks into, right?

If she hadn’t wanted to be raped, she wouldn’t have been drunk. Of course, men can get drunk anytime they want to, and if someone shoves their dick up their ass, it’s the other person’s fault because they’re a pervert. It certainly can’t be because you’re a drunken asshole. Men never ask for rape, but women do it all the time. Right?

Wrong, fucktard. Just plain wrong. If it’s okay for you to get drunk and maintain your safety from rape, it’s okay for women to. Why? Women are not responsible for your reprehensible actions. You are. Women are not responsible for what you do. In the end, if you use your penis as a weapon, it’s not sex, it’s violence.

If you rape, and your life is “ruined,” you’re getting exactly what you deserve. If you go to jail, you earned it. If you don’t get that scholarship or are branded a sex offender for the rest of your life, you’re getting what’s coming to you. If your family is embarrassed, they should be. They failed to teach you right from wrong, and they allowed you to grow up thinking that you have the right to take whatever it is you want, regardless of the cost to others. If I had my way, you all would be sharing a fucking cell.

Let me make my position very clear. You and you alone, are in control of your every action, and if you act to harm someone else, you need to suffer the consequences of those actions. If you go to jail or get the shit beaten out of you by her relatives or he, you’ve reaped what you’ve sown, and I have no sympathy for you.

Women, you’re not getting off free here, either. I’ve seen some of you posting how she deserved it. It’s disgusting. Every two minutes, a woman is sexually assaulted. Every TWO minutes, there is a sexual assault. In the time that it’s taken to get this far into my rant, about 3 women have been sexually assaulted. 97% of rapists NEVER serve a single day in jail. Some statistics show that 2/3 of the female population will be the victim of some sort of sexual assault in their lifetime. That means that every morning when you wake up, you have a 66% chance of being sexually assaulted.

If you’re one of the despicable beings that’s out there saying that she “deserved” it, or worse “asked for it,” Congratulations. You are, officially, advocating for your own rape or sexual assault. You are giving cover to those that might rape you. You are saying that it’s okay for men to victimize women. I hope you’re very proud of yourself. You’re making it possible for 97% of rapists to go free and rape again. Good job, there. I hope it works out for you. I really do hope that one of those 97% don’t meet you today. Rest assured, though. If you do meet one of them, they’ll say that you deserved it, even though you really didn’t.

Rape is a horrible crime that has nothing to do with sex. It’s about power and control. It’s violence committed against women. Men get raped too, but it’s primarily a crime against women, and we all know it. Women cannot stop rape. It’s not women that are doing the raping. Men can stop rape by not becoming rapists, and my making it clear to other men that rape is unacceptable and will be punished.

During a series of rapes in Israel, it was once suggested that women have a curfew to “protect” them from being raped. Golda Meir said, “Men are committing the rapes. Let them be put under curfew.”  It’s not up to women to protect themselves from being raped. It’s up to men to stop raping women.

I haven’t written for a while. Part of it is that my daughter recently got married and trying to get ready for that kept me busy. The larger part is that I’ve been really angry. Events in the world and in the US have made me furious and I didn’t want to use this space simply to vent my anger.

So, now I’m back. Good for me? Yes. Good for you?? Who the hell knows? That’s for you to decide.

There is something that I want to talk about though, and it does have to do with anger. Not my anger, necessarily, but I have been guilty of it, and I know that the Pagan community is guilty of it as well. As a matter of fact, all adherents of all religions do it.

During the holiday season, which is made up of the Holy Days of lots of religion, there is a lot of religious back and forth. Christians make a lot of noise about how Jesus is the reason for the Season, and Pagans talking about how the Christian holidays are based on the older Pagan beliefs. When we do this, we are not only angering Christians to no avail, but we are unknowingly, invoking Jehovah into our own lives.

I know what’s coming. Really, I do. I know that many will disagree and argue vociferously about how Pagans are only trying to “instruct” and inform about the “history” of holidays. I’m not arguing about whether or not that’s true. It mostly likely is. I’m talking about the unexpected consequences of our speech. I’m talking about how what we talk about is what we manifest, to a large extent.

By talking, continually, even in the negative, about any deity, they are, obviously, an important part of your life. Anger is a passionate emotion. By addressing a Deity with that much passion and emotion, that Deity becomes a part of your life and that Deity takes it as an invitation to enter your life at will.

I hear this all the time. This or that God is “evil” or “wicked.” This or that scripture is flawed, faulty and inherently wrong. The myths are full of horrible contradictions or stories that promote some sort of horrid thing. All myths are that way. (Have you read the Song of the Volsungs? Seriously, there isn’t a single mentally healthy person in that book.)

What we are doing, by focusing on the Deity and the religion is letting the adherents of that belief system off the hook. It’s not the Deity or the religion that’s evil. It’s the people that follow and interpret the scriptures in ways that make it so easy to abuse and deny the rights of others. By focusing our attention on the Deity or religion, we are also making those things a part of our daily lives. We are inviting those things to live in our hearts and minds. We are inviting that Deity and it’s belief systems to take a large part in our lives.

So, how do we fight those who act upon beliefs whose tenets diametrically oppose our own? It’s not by attacking those beliefs. It’s by attacking the actions of those people that commit the acts. It’s not the fault of the belief; it is, entirely, the fault of the person. It’s not the Deity or beliefs that want to keep people that love each other from marrying, it’s the people using it as an excuse that causes the pain.

Stop fighting the belief, it’s a losing battle. Fight the people, they are causing the pain.